I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Randomize