Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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