Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
