dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Randomize
