i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
