We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
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