Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
