i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
