so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize