I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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