watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
