I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
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