you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
