Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
We are two peas in an std pod
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
