Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
