i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
