I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize