Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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