Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
