dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
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