I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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