I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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