Hey man sorry I got all grabby
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
