Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
