In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
