I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
