I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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