I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize