Taylor Swift is so right about you.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
