I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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