she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
