On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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