Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize