An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Everyone says I win the strip club
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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