Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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