I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.