Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
