How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
