weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
