I think I just saw someone hide a body.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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