i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
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