Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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