whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize