I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
