We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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