i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
