Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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