put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
