please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
