i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
